"Everyday"

I was sitting holding my little Claire at 6:30 in the morning, she is getting so big, and she was sad. She wanted to be comforted ,I was trying my best to comfort her. Then I became sad. I use to( a week ago) nurse her in the morning, but that is all over and I am glad it is, two years is along time. Somehow though, I became sad too. I missed that link I had to her. I could look down in her eyes and know I was making her happy. I know there are other ways and I will move into a new rhythm with her, life is about change. Yet I still miss the closeness. {Strange I know.}

Today we moved Jack out of the huge room that he shared with his two brothers. Now there is a huge whole in the room where Jack used to be. I think his brothers feel the huge whole.{ OK maybe just me}

Blake is going to push me right over the edge. He is five, potty trained and according to him does not have time to stop what he is doing to go to the bathroom, so consequently he has accidents all the time or he pees all over the bathroom because he has waited to long. I know this sounds gross, but it is my life. (me screaming)

Now it is 10:20 pm and I need to clean up the kitchen, decorate for Sam's big day tommorow{ he will be 8} then clean my bed off it is full of laundry so I can sleep. {Whew}